These are uncertain times and around the world people everywhere are trying to find ways of dealing with the losses they have suffered. For thousands of people they have lost friends, co-workers, family as a result of the pandemic. These are painful losses and will take time and patience to heal. These are times when we need to come together safely, to mourn those we have lost, but also to celebrate their lives and the things they brought in your life. The pain will recede over time and their will times when little things might catch you and a memory will surface that will remind you of the pain. There is no shame in admitting that you are struggling. This week I want to talk about ways that help you process the grief, the pain and sadness that follows loss.
Grief come in many stages and does not always follow a linear path sometimes we find ourselves in a stage we thought we had already passed. This is perfectly normal and is not something we should stress about. But one way to help us through the pain is to celebrate the person. When we hold funerals part of this sad occasion is known as the wake, this is where family, friends and associates get to together to celebrate the life of the person who has passed. However celebrating the deceased persons life does not have to end there. Celebrate other special occasion that were significant to the as a way to honor their memory, bring you a sense of connection with them and share the joys and passions they had in life with others. Maybe even connect with others who may have shared their interests and learn about their time with your loved one.
This brings to the second thing I want to talk about, and that is connecting with others. It is important when we suffer a loss that we do not allow the grief and pain to cause us to isolate ourselves (unless it is for medical reasons) . We all need to feel connected to others in some form or another it is part of who we are as much as the colour of our skin is we are social, in times of loss it can be very tempting to cut ourselves off other and try to bear the pain and grief alone. I am here to tell that you do not have to face it alone. That feeling of isolation and pain may make you feel that you alone and have no-one to reach and for support, but while it is valid as a feeling does not mean it is a fact there are other around you who can offer support, they can offer advice or even just a shoulder to cry on when you need to let the pain and grief out and just let go. Let them help you rebuild your life and move forward with the knowledge that you have the support, whether it is material such as financial aid, it could advice on where to get help. Or it could be mental or emotional support a kind friend who you can talk to when the pain becomes a little too much there is always someone there who is willing to help all you have to do is take that first brave step and reach out.